Challenges of a Woman (2 of 2)

Among the many challenges of women, time management is one. For the working mother, they have to balance work life versus family life.

In the workplace, we are expected to be tough, not easily affected, while subject to personal hazards. It’s like short of saying, forget that we are women or at least, not think, act, react like women do. We want to achieve, to excel but so afraid of the consequences.  There is this book that I’m reading, it’s written by Dr. Linda Austin, a professor of Psychiatry. The title of the book is “What’s Holding You Back?”

She tells us of the Psychological Glass Ceiling. This is the ceiling that we have unconsciously erected in our minds…to stop us from further advancing in our careers. For me, I was conflicted. At 23, I married and a year after, I had my first child. I thanked God about this. It was also the same time my career was just about to flourish.  I was given a managerial position which took much of me. I knew that it was critical for me to master time management but at that age, it was so difficult. Whenever I had a promotion, I would stop and ask myself, is this all worth it?

For my second child, I was already managing a thrift bank. When I leave the house, he would still be sleeping and upon my arrival, he would already be asleep…  This went on for more than a year before it dawned on me… What have I compromised? I would be at work when my younger sister would call me to say that my eldest son hurt his head or had to be rushed to the emergency room. I was running an entire office effectively but not my own household.  I know, deep in my heart, my children simply just wanted me to be… home.

I do not have that luxury of basking in the glory of my achievements at work because there would always be that question… What was the trade-off? I’ve seen this big billboard in CDO one time, it said,    ” No amount of success can compensate for the failure at home”. That statement rang so true!

I was already having problems with my own marriage. I knew that somewhere, somehow, I had a hand in it.

I just had too much on my plate.  

Maintaining a good and healthy relationship between husband and wife, boyfriend/ girlfriend, is an important matter that needed attending to.

Now I see clearly how traditional works. My mom was a housewife. It was my father who decided that.  That decision was probably one of the best ones he has made for us, their children. Life wasn’t so complicated then.  My mother had her ways to make her day active and productive. Later, she was able to convince my father to start a business.  A bookstore. I believe it was one of the first book shops Davao had in the late 70’s. I remember growing up in that bookstore. My parents would bring us their every day .  It was a joyous time for me and my siblings!

Women face countless challenges, struggling to re-define their roles, striking a balance in their home and work life. We have come far and should be proud not only for what we have achieved but of what we are still capable of.